People and Adventures

Lucy,

I wanted to mark this past weekend. It was a jam packed weekend. One that left me exhausted and absolutely slap full of joy.  From neighborhood picnics, to cook-outs and live music on Saturday, then church, a 6 mile canoe paddle (complete with a tipped boat in the middle of the river), and a Bar-B-Q on Sunday.   You moved from one event to the next with your sweet spirit and your ready-to-go attitude.  You are a little extrovert, a people-lover for sure, just like your daddy.

I imagine that when you’re older and you ask for a story about the early years, this will be a weekend I tell you about.

What I can’t wait to tell you, is just how big of a person is in your tiny little body.  You are so delightfully infectious.  When you enter a gathering, you meet each gaze with a big cheesy smile.  You so genuinely love being around people, that they genuinely enjoy your company.  And from someone who’s always been an introvert and struggled some with shyness, it’s awe-inspiring to watch you.  Saturday night you charmed all and by the time we left everyone knew your name and your dance moves.   

But here's where you really blew me away...

When we were first asked about going on a 6 mile river paddle, I admit I didn't think it would happen.  You are just so active right now and do not like being constrained in any way and I could just imagine a 3 hour wrestling match trying to keep you inside the boat all the way down the river.

But your dad and I talked, and decided that we didn't want to make decisions and miss opportunities based on how we assume you may or may not react to something  After all, from biking to backpacking, you have loved it all.  And we've been wanting to get you on the water for awhile now.  So why not now?

When we arrived at the drop-off point, we definitely got some "she's so cute!" mixed in with some "you're so brave!"  

Lucy, we had high hopes and we're thinking positively, but you blew us away.  Three hours on the water and not only did you not have any melt downs, but you were so in love with the whole situation.  You took turns sitting with your dad in the back and then sitting with me in the front, helping us paddle, skimming the water with your fingers, and playing with pine cones and eating blueberries in the middle of the boat.  You waved and squealed at the other kayaks and canoes.  We stopped on a rock island and you climbed around on the rocks and splashed in the water.  You enjoyed every part of it. 

You fell asleep in my arms the last 15 minutes or so and stayed asleep as I climbed out of the boat and we waited to be picked up.  You were exhausted.  But in your typical power nap fashion, you woke after 30 minutes.  Just in time to get some dry clothes on and join everyone for a Bar-B-Q and more dancing of course.

You have your Mama's adventure heart and your Daddy's people heart.  I can't wait to see how God uses that...

Grow Garden Grow

This is one of my favorite times...

When the garden is full of tiny, miniature, examples of the produce that is only weeks away from being placed on our table.

I have such an excellent helper this year.

Mama and the Moon

You know those little books that you see near check-out lines?  Cute, funny, or inspiring books with pictures and words of wisdom or humor.  I normally do not pay much attention to them.  But one caught my eye the other day.  

The title…

 “My Mother Gave Me the Moon.”

So I stopped and read through it and thought, wow, this is my mother to a T!

Even more than that, I thought, this is the kind of mother I want to be.

Thank you Mama, for giving me the moon.   I wish I would have written these words first, but they still come straight from my heart!

My mother gave me the moon.

My mother gave me the stars.

My mother gave me the universe and all its little miracles.

My mother gave me warmth.

My mother gave me security.

An all the while, my mother gave me room to grow and the freedom to discover the world for myself.

My mother gave me the gift of countless sunny afternoons…

Of wheelbarrow races and butterfly chases,

Bubbles of all sizes and sweet surprises.

My mother gave me childhood, pure and joyful.

My mother gave me friendship.

My mother gave me faith.

She instilled in me a sense of wonder and the wisdom to be gentle with all living things.

My mother gave me dreams and the courage to believe in them.

And she still does.

My mother made everyday days seem special.

And made special days nothing short of magical.

She taught me to hold traditions dear…

And family close.

And long before anyone else did…

My mother showed me what love really is.

14 Months

Ahhhhhh!  Lucy baby girl…joy, joy, joy.  That is what you bring to my life.  You are pure joy.  

So much has changed in the short 2 months that you turned a year old.  Gone is that baby, pitiful with red, swollen gums with a new tooth popping out weekly.  Gone is the baby clinging to me 24/7, anxious and uneasy on the cusp of a new world, with new views and new heights all on 2 wobbly legs.

My little baby is gone.

You are this brave, confident, funny, loving little girl.   

Still rocking your low-maintenance, old man hairdo of course. 

Lucy, you are hilarious.  You walk up to little girls in public and try to hold their hand like your best friends.  When we finish eating at restaurants you like to walk by each table and flash a smile and make sure they’re all enjoying their meal.  You are so affectionate.  If you see me on the floor, you stop what you are doing and come crawl into my lap and lay your head on my chest.  Sometimes only for .3 seconds, but I love it.  You also still give the best open-mouth, wet, slobbery kisses ever.  I steal about 77 every day.  

You’ve become a dance machine.  You turn any sound into a rhythm that can be rocked, swayed and stomped too.  Sometimes the only sound seems to be playing in your head alone, but you dance.  You like to do drive-by piano playing.  On your way around the house, you pause just long enough to reach as high as you can and play a few notes.

Your favorite word is still, Uh-Oh.  You use sign language with us for the words:  more, all done, sit, and eat.  The sit one kind of backfired on us though.  You love to climb onto every piece of furniture, especially your little rocking chair, and then stand up and look directly at us with the biggest smirk on your face while doing the sign for sit.  But you understand so much more.  In one of your word books, I can ask you where the banana, baby, blueberries, and pine cone is and you can point them out and then proceed to clap and applaud yourself for a job well done.  You immediately start clapping when we sing, If You’re Happy and You Know It.  You can point out your nose and belly.  I can ask you to go get a book and you walk over to your bookshelf and bring back as many as you can carry.  You pretend to give your baby doll some of your water.  After you’re done eating, you go and get your play broom and dust pan and try and sweep under your seat.  If you’re not trying to help me push the vacuum cleaner, then you’re trying to ride the canister.  

You laugh, all the time.  You laugh at your dad and me when we twirl you around or make funny faces or play chase.  You laugh at yourself, whenever the thought happens to cross your mind.  When we’re out with others and you hear someone laugh you make this grand effort at this fake laugh like you totally get the joke.  You just want to be a part of everything good this world has to offer. 

I don’t sit much these days.  But I am loving this time Lucy.  I have so much fun with you.

We have a lot of fun planned for this Summer and I look forward to sharing everything with you.

Love,

Mama

3 Years

Yesterday was three years.   

Three years of being a wife.  

I’m fully aware that three years is nothing.  Nothing.  Since I will be growing old with this man.

But I can say that I’ve learned more in these three years than any other time in my life.

I’ve learned that marriage is a lot more then choosing to love your best friend forever.  It’s letting God use that person to mold and shape you into the image of Christ.  

You head down the road together; learning to be selfless, giving grace, showing mercy, and offering forgiveness.

In these three years I have been humbled and overwhelmed by the amount of grace, mercy, and forgiveness I have received from the man I married.

I’m honored to be in a union where love is given without condition.  The kind of love that is given because Christ is teaching us to love as He did.  

Thank you, Steven, for a love that is genuine and transforming.

I love my life with you.

Mama's t-shirt, Baby's romper

I was pleasantly surprised today with a project.

I was feeling really tired and lethargic today.

Lucy however, was not.

In days bygone, my remedy would have been to curl up with my latest book or have a favorite movie marathon.

Lucy however, isn't too keen on that idea.

So then I thought that maybe if I just throw myself into a project, then between that, doing laps with Lucy around the house and making 17 trips outside to the yard, I would be too busy to remember I was tired.

I have a stack of clothes that I was getting ready to donate.  I pulled out an old t-shirt.  It was one of those super soft, worn in t-shirts, and I thought what a perfect summer fabric.

I accidentally deleted the before and during pictures.  But basically I laid one of her little shirts on top and cut out the arm holes and then sewed up the sides.  Then I cut down the middle and sewed pants legs.  Then I hemmed over the neck line and pulled some string through, so that when it's slack Lucy can step through and then we can cinch it around her neck and tie a bow.

I know this is a lot of pictures.  But look at the kid!  How would you narrow it down?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Our evenings...

Evenings should be like this.

Sitting in his and her chairs, but not facing a TV.

Out on the back porch.

Lit by a string of lights.

Just enough to read his newest issue of Mother Earth News, and me to scribble down some thoughts.

The sun has only been gone for a little while.  We watch as the back yard darkens and the only thing visible past the slanted tin roof overhead is the dangling limbs of our cherry blossom, heavy with blooms.

We read, we talk, we discuss...we dream.

From something I just read:

Fear and despair creep their way into everyone's life.  They overtake our daily decisions without our even noticing, smothering our imagination...unless we take the time to dream.  Dreaming about what we truly want for our homes, for our families, for our land and communities, and for our time is the best antidote I know for fear and despair.  Each time we reflect on what we most want in our lives, we are pushed to examine the barriers that are keeping us from our dreams.  And each time we examine and express them, the barriers grow a tiny bit weaker, the dreams grow a tiny bit more clear. ~Shannon Hayes

Steven and I are so different in so many ways.  But as far as what we want for our future and our family, we are on the same page.  That is something I treasure, and do not want to ever take for granted.  We love to dream.  Yes we dream differently, we approach those dreams differently, we express them differently.  Steven dreams, and get out of his way!  He's on the move.  I dream, and I write a really long journal entry about it, take a hundred pictures of the process, and then imagine what my kids and grandkids will think about it when they read it in 50 years :)

Different, yes.  But oh we have dreams.  Great dreams.  And spending the time talking about them sends such joyful, electric energy through me.  Such a beautiful picture is painted.

Looking out our back porch, into the future, we both see land; fields, old trees, some sort of water.  We see a small chicken coop.  We see a goat, some lambs, maybe some horses one day.  We see a little studio shed for me.  A work shed for him.  Our vegetable garden is bigger.  I have an area of nothing but wild flowers and anything that strikes my fancy, fenced for protection from our four-legged children.  Land that will be explored by our children, lots of children, living out a Huck Finn childhood. Land walked a million times by our family.  A home that while not huge, will be filled with character and love and simplicity.  A place where we will be able to give back, however that may be.  We see it.  We're not afraid of our hands getting dirty and our backs being sore, or even learning to remain joyful while discouraged.  We see it.

Here's the best part of that dream.  There's not a rushed sense of urgency.  There's this peace with this dream of ours.

My husband.  He's been putting the 'do' behind my dreams since we met.  He's amazing.  It flows out of him so naturally, this ability to turn a dream into motion.  Into achievable steps, into action.  So there's no sense of longing that usually comes with something you know you'll never get.

I know we'll get there.

There's so much peace that comes with that.  And that allows me the freedom to fully embrace and love where we are. 

I believe God has given us our desires and our dreams.  I look forward to achieving them for His glory.  To see what He teaches us, how we grow, how we can give back to Him.

But I also believe God uses every season of our lives and I don't want to miss out on the lessons and joy a part of this one.

I have never felt more child-like in front of God, than after the birth of my own child.  I have stayed at His feet, wanting to learn, to grow, to be comforted, to be groomed, to be loved.  I already know I will always look back at this time with great affection.  A time of complete vulnerability, humility, and faith.  So many things have shifted in my heart and my perception of who I am in God's eyes.  He is molding me.  He is challenging me.  He is strengthening me.  Because He loves me, more deeply than I can truly comprehend and He wants my life filled with genuine joy and peace.

So I've mentioned I've married a doer.  An organized productive, efficient doer.  I'm not sure any of those adjectives would be used to define me.  So it's been a challenge for me to bring my head knowledge and heart's passion of wanting to be this Radical Homemaker into fruition.  One evening I found myself in a tearful discussion of how I want to do so much more for our house and as a wife and as a mother but I just keep seeming to miss the mark.  Then I basically continued on with a list of excuses.  Here's what my husband said to me, "Having a lot of land and having a lot of kids is going to be a lot of work.  So now is the time to figure it out."

It wasn't critical, it wasn't mean, it wasn't judgemental.  It was wise.

So yes, we have a beautiful, exciting, challenging dream.  A dream that will be achieved.  But until then I will squeeze every drop of love, joy, and lessons from where we are now.

Praise God for His wisdom and His timing.  May I never lose sight of the ultimate goal.  To glorify God in all that I do.  To walk the path He has chosen for me.  To seek Him above all.  No dream, no desire is possible without Him.  Without Him, there is no life.

Thank you Lord for the view from our back porch.  Our little back yard that we groomed as newlyweds.  The backyard where we planted our first garden.  The first backyard our little girl gets to explore.